I’m waiting for the last part of my breakfast (Yeah, I know it’s very late, such is life) to finish cooking in my instant pot. Thought I’d take the time to do a little self reflection here.

I’m pretty proud of the work I’ve been doing with my repositories in the last few days. Yesterday, I went through and archived/deleted all of my abandoned/tutorial-based/garbage repositories on GitHub, bringing my total down from 52 to 31. If I’d wanted to be a bit more harsh, I could probably have brought it down to around 20 active repositories… But I have difficulty throwing things away, which the method for deleting things on GitHub just exacerbates.

In addition to that, though, I’ve actually been working on some coding projects again! Most active is libfileio0, a small library I’m writing to handle loading and saving plaintext files in my programs. Currently, it can interface with CSV files with arbitrarily many arbitrarily long entries, provided they follow a standard I’ve yet to codify anywhere (it’s based around how forms-mode saves files, since I use that as my database format of choice).

As for my health, I’m down from 213.8 lbs to 206.8 lbs today. I’ve lagged with my weight training (though I plan to get back on that horse today), and also lagged a bit with my food logging, but for the most part I’ve been able to keep things moving forward smoothly. I’ve yet to have a really big lapse in progress, and I’ve only been following the plan at all since 2018-01-03.

My biggest hurdle is my family; apart from the fact that my Dad loves to eat very caloric foods all of the time (he and my brother are both the ate-30-burgers-and-gained-one-pound kind of people), living at home is proving to be very stressful for me in ways that make me want to live unhealthily.

Hopefully I can still rectify that soon.

Finally, I wanted to reflect on how… rewarding?… crocheting and cooking are for me.

I almost wrote relaxing, satisfying, or beneficial, but I think rewarding is the best word for it. Relaxing is something I suck at, but also something that doesn’t apply to most things I enjoy. I like to be engaged and challenged, and those things don’t really mesh with relaxing. Satisfying is more of a physical feeling for me anyway (my daily walks are “satisfying”), but even so it really is more of a passive/consumption-based emotion. These are both things I find gratifying through the practice of them, and not solely for the joy I get when I present my work to others or even myself.

And beneficial is the coward’s way out, hiding in a den of obscurity and void of meaning. Too vague to be of any use.

Enough lexical calvinball, though.

Crochet helps me to quiet my ever-mumbling mind for a bit. Following repetitive, complex patterns built on simple rules is pretty meditative for me, allowing me to briefly let every little thought and nagging paranoia pass through my mind without overstaying its welcome. It makes me calm in a way that I treasure, which is (I suppose) why I continue to practice it week after week.

I’ve just finished an infinity scarf for my brother, and I’m making another one for my sister right now. Maybe I’ll touch on that in greater detail in another post.

Cooking, on the other hand, is rewarding in more active ways. Making something valuable out of very little (I rarely cook something anyone might call ‘gourmet’, choosing instead to focus on making do with what I have) has always been a sticking point for my brain. But more than that, turning these basic ingredients into something photo-worthy, or this $20 bill into food for a week is reminiscent of the kind of magic described in Tamora Pierce novels.

And I can think of very few more rewarding things than that.

Categories:  reflections 
Tags:  instant-pot  github  libfileio0  health  personal